The Book of Anon/The Book of Catnarok

Cagnarök is the doom of Anonymous, and the end of the chans.

It begins with three winters of wars in Miðgarð. Then Fimbulvetr follows, the winter of winters, with bitter frosts and biting winds. Three such winters will follow with no summer between them.

Cocks will crow to raise the fags in Colette's realm. Furries will sail with the myspace fags. The fags of Gaia will advance from the south, led by The Party Van. All will converge on the field: milhouse and the fags from Colette and Tacgnol and furries and Gaians and The Party Van and the myspacefags.

Meanwhile, the chans, roused by Anonymous' threads, will meet in council. Longcat will ride with Raptor Jesus to KFC to take advice from Happy Negro. Lolis will shake and moan. All of the /b/tards and all of the /i/nsurgents will arm and prepare themselves and follow Longcat to Catnarok.

On the field of battle, Longcat will engage Tacgnol, while Serious Cat will be attacked by Milhouse, who is still not a meme. Cockmongler will fight the Party Van. Serious Cat will kill Milhouse with a single stroke, but will be, in turn, killed by furries. The furries will leap at the throats of the /b/tards, and they will kill each other.

The /i/nsurgents will kill gaia and myspace with a massive attack, but will drown in the venom spewed by the serpent. Tacgnol will seize Longcat between his jaws and swallow him. At once, Raptor Jesus, Longcat's son, will press one foot on Tacgnol's lower jaw and grab his upper jaw, tearing the Tacgnol apart and avenging his father.

The Party Van will fling subpoenas in all directions. 4chan and 420chan and 7chan and 12chan will become 404. The 'chans will burn and the memes will die. Men, women, and children will die, traps will die, camwhores will die. Birds and animals will die. The 'chans will sink into the sea.

Raptor Jesus, son of Longcat, will still be alive and will make his way to the intartubes, the shining plain where the chans once stood. /b/randon, son of Anonymous, will join him there, and he will inherent his father's taste for raep and traps. /b/tards and /i/nsurgents will come back from the world of the dead. They will fap and will build new boards.

With the rebirth after Catnarök, the golden age of Anonymous will return. A radiant chan will rise up which no flames of perdition can touch. In it's boards, the noble anon who fought will live on in joy. The ignoble will be carried away by a hueg cock to be assraeped and Raptor Jesus will build on the triumphant foundations laid down by Longcat.