Copypasta/Hal Turner Zimmerism

"HI, I’M HAL TURNER, FOUNDER AND MANAGER OF THE TURNER RADIO NETWORK. WHY JUST YESTERDAY I WAS SITTING WITH MY SUPERB SON AS HE SUCKED MY STUPENDOUS SHINING SWORD OF GLORY WHEN FROM THE DOOR I HEARD AN BLUSTERING KNOCK, AT WHICH MOMENT MY ADORED ANAL ACQUAINTANCE ARTY BURST THROUGH IT, "WHY HELLO HAL" HE SCREAMED AS I SPRANG SWIFTLY TO SCOFF AT HIS STALLION SIZED SHOWBOAT BY WHICH TIME MY FLAP FERVENT FRIEND PAUL GELLAR HAD PLUNGED INTO THE FLAVORSOME BURROW OF MY FRESHLY FORCOME WIFE WHILST MY SON PROCEEDED TO PLEASURE THE WAVERING WAND OF YANKY-JIM AS HE SCREAMED AN EAR-SPLITTING SONG OF SATISFACTION, BUT DO NOT BE JEALOUS OF THIS FANATICALLY AROUSING ARENA FOR I WOULD DO AS MUCH FOR ALL SUCH FOLK WHO APPROACHED WITH BENEVOLENCE MY NINE-FOOT NEGRO NEUTRALIZING BATON. I GUARANTEE IT."