Forum Trolling

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This is meant to be a quick overview of how to effectively, legally troll someone over the internet, in the form of debate. Note that these in constructions are for quick, blatant trolling--If you want to really get under an entire community's skin, try PsyOps.

Ground Rules

  1. DO NOT USE CAPS LOCK, EXCEPT IN A CONDESCENDING MANOR TO MOCK THEIR USE OF CAPS LOCK.
  2. Always strive to use perfect (or nearly perfect) grammar and spelling.
  3. Do not directly insult them or appear angry, as this gives them the impression that they're gaining ground.

Tips

While the ground rules are important, here are a few simple ways to make yourself seem more intelligent.

  1. Use '--' and ';' correctly, so as to make yourself seem more intelligent.
  2. To rebut an argument, break their post down into quotes, and rebut them sentence-by-sentence.
  3. . Use lists, ASCII diagrams, images (if allowed), etc to illustrate your point
  4. Point out every logical fallacy you can find in their argument (e.g. circular logic, naturalistic fallacy). A list of logical fallacies can be found in Wikipedia
  5. Point out the other person's bad grammar and/or spelling in a condescending manor at the end of your post.
  6. Use a thesaurus to find big words to use in your sentences, so it looks like you have a larger vocabulary and are therefor more intelligent.
  7. Cite your sources, preferably in MLA format, at the bottom of your posts. You may also try using Chicago style citations to backup individual statements.

Prolonged Arguments

The longer you debate, the more opportunities will become available to you. Try to take advantage of all of these, as it will cause your opponent to RAAAAAAAGE.

  1. No doubt your opponent will have 'moved the goalposts' (another logical fallacy, note this as well), and as a result there may be contradictions between their posts. Point out these contradictions.
  2. If they resort to using abstract metaphors, apply these metaphors to something else, so as to make both the metaphor and the argument behind the metaphor seem useless.
 EXAMPLE: "The universe is like a book, and God is like an author" -> "Who's the editor?  How do we know that Yehova and the universe are not the book and Thor is the author?" 
  1. Fragment your sentences. A moderate amount. To emphasize an argument or point.
  2. Use quotes--lots of quotes. Preferably from famous people. Better yet, quote-mine anyone that they quote or cite for something that aids your argument.

Getting yourself out of a pickle

It is inevitable that, eventually, you will say/do something stupid. Here are some things that you should avoid, and ways to avoid them.

  1. Increasingly long, drawn-out discussions on theoreticals. This becomes especially common when debating theists, as you'll somehow end up arguing about things *within* Christianity/Islam/etc, as opposed to whether or not Christianity/Islam/etc (or whatever religion/philosophy you're debating against) is actually true. In these instances, when in doubt, say "prove it".
  2. If you find yourself lacking understanding of the subject (or part of the subject), wiki it.
  3. If you run out of material or can't think, use Google to find other people who have argued on the same subject, and steal their arguments shamelessly. Just make sure they don't contradict anything that you've said.

Now, taking this advice to heart, TROLL! DO IT FGT!